The Trial of the Victim Named Sheldon
by DarkAngelSnapeLover
Summary: Sheldon has been killed! This is the story of the humerous trial that follows this heinous crime. R&R please!


The Trial of the Victim Named Sheldon

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"Defendant, how do you plead?"

"Not guilty."

"The trial for the defendant will commence tomorrow morning at seven a.m. Please be on time. Court dismissed.

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This is the story of what happened when a girl snapped and killed someone, a smart someone, someone with vast knowledge, well of everything he considered important. This trial shows why it pays not to be annoying when you hold such knowledge within your human mind, even if you think that you're right and that germs can really kill you. Enjoy the trial, and its outcome, I hope.

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"The defendant, at twelve-oh-one a.m. on the night of December the first, a Wednesday, killed the victim over a minor incident. A video surveillance camera stationed near her door captured the moment. I will now play this tape for the jury. As you can see, she has picked up a…hot glue gun and shot the hot substance over him. Though we have no audio, we can determine that he is screaming with pain. Now, she grabs the cloth tying her curtains back from in front of the apartment's windows and she strangles him. Clearly, this act was premeditated and she was quite angry at the victim. This is cold-blooded first degree murder. No further evidence needs to be presented to the jury," the lawyer said sternly. The defendant rolled her eyes carefully and watched as her lawyer stood.

"I have the audio leading up to the incident. My client was egged on by the work of a serial mastermind. He intentionally struck up a confrontation with my client over the smell coming from her apartment. According to witness accounts, which will be told again later in the trial, the confrontation began weeks before, if not months according to one, and it took her this long to even stand up to him. She is obviously facing some sort of nervous breakdown from the constant badgering of the victim, who insulted her day and night because of her lack of intelligence. This man was clearly asking for it, and I am asking you, the jury, to have mercy on my client, who is not guilty," her lawyer exclaimed. The jury looked around nervously as witnesses began coming to the stand. The first witness was a roommate of the victim.

"Yes, that is correct. He did continually mention the mold problem in her apartment, but that was only because it was affecting the entire building, and Sheldon was in charge of helping the landlord stay up to code. If that code were ever broken, we would all be without a home, but she just couldn't understand that and now Sheldon's dead! Because of you!" he screamed like a female. He sobbed until two bailiffs led him to his seat.

"No further questions," each lawyer whispered, afraid of what the next witness would get them. It was the defendant, and her telling of the murder was the same as her lawyer's case.

"He made me kill him! He would not shut up long enough for me to tell him that it had nothing to do with mold, and then, one night, I killed him, because I was sick and tired of being nagged day and night! It's already terrible having to face being stupid in front of the four of them, and then Sheldon comes around every day telling me how disgusting mold is and how I need to get it cleaned and how I'm ruining not just my own life but his, and I couldn't take it anymore, so I hit him with the hot glue to get him weakened and then I strangled him just so I couldn't hear his stupid voice anymore! Yes, I killed him, but because he was driving me crazy! And now that he's gone, there's obviously no one here to tell me I'm crazy since he thought he knew EVERYTHING! I'm glad I did it, because now, if you let me go back home, I can lay there in peace!" the defendant bellowed.

"No further questions," her lawyer smiled. He thought that this part of her testimony would aid him in his case, until the prosecution stood and began questioning his client intensely. Thanks to good planning, this might have worked out.

"Now, Penny, you told the court in your previous testimony that he was constantly badgering you on what subject?" the prosecution asked.

"The mold I tell you, it was said to be growing in my walls; Sheldon said it was growing in my walls. Sheldon thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought…," Penny whispered while rocking back and forth, staring straight ahead.

"Okay, Penny? Penny…Penny!" the lawyer yelled.

"But Sheldon…," she cried. "I killed Sheldon because…he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything…."

"Stop it!!" the prosecution yelled. "Enough! You're crazy because of Sheldon! Sheldon thought he knew everything! Sheldon thought you had mold growing in your walls, but you said no, I DON'T have mold growing in my walls, but he thought he knew EVERYTHING! NOW I'M SAYING IT TOO! I HAVE MOLD GROWING IN MY WALLS BECAUSE SHELDON KNOWS EVERYTHING AND SHELDON SAID SO!!! SHELDON'S DEAD! GET OVER YOURSELF!" he panted.

"You're out of order, both of you! Sit down!" the judge bellowed.

"Yes, Your Honor," Penny said monotonously. As she walked away, she whispered, "Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything…," she whispered. The judge then killed the uproar in the courtroom with her gavel.

"Now, closing arguments need to be stated. Prosecution, are you able to do the closing statement, or must Penny tell you what to say?" she asked sternly.

"I'm prepared, Your Honor. Penny killed Sheldon that cold night over mold, and I think she deserves to pay for the friend she took away from that apartment complex, from this planet, that probably spins a little weaker at such a crazed murder. When blood is shed this heartlessly, someone must pay, and that person must be Penny," the prosecution whispered. Penny's lawyer then stood.

"This girl is obviously at her breaking point. She killed Sheldon in an act of insanity, not cruelty. Men and Women of the jury, have mercy on her soul, and see that she really is a troubled woman who deserves to be set free from an act she committed in a moment of weakness. Show her mercy," the defendant smiled to the jury. They looked to each other as they were led from the room to converse over the verdict. During this time, the court dismissed for a break before the verdict would be announced, but Penny could not be moved from under the table she had sat at for two days now.

She was in a fetal position, whispering to herself quietly, "The mold I tell you, it was said to be growing in my walls; Sheldon said it was growing in my walls. Sheldon thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought I had mold growing in my walls, but I said no, I don't have mold growing in my walls, but Sheldon, he thought he knew everything. Sheldon thought…"

"Ladies and gentlemen, please return to your seats. Please stand for the honorable Judge Redding," a bailiff said sternly over the group.

"Thank you. Would the members of the jury please enter the courtroom?" she asked. The group filed inside and took their seats. "Members of the jury, have you reached a unanimous decision over this charge or any other?"

"Yes, Your Honor," the lead juror replied.

"Bailiff, could you please bring me their enclosed decision? I will now read their statement aloud. 'We the jury find the defendant not guilty on first-degree murder or any lesser charge due to insanity.' Juror number one, do you agree fully with this statement…?"

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And so, Penny was let off on her charge of killing me, but it's alright. I thought I knew everything. I said she had mold growing in her walls, but said in mocking female voice that she didn't have mold growing in her walls ends mocking voice, but I thought I knew everything. I said she had…

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END


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